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Student Log: Stardate
- Nikhil Goyal
7:00 AM: Home: Bed
7:30 AM: Bus Stop
“Bhaiya ji, 447 to paanch minute pehle nikal gai, heh, heh, heh.”
That’ll probably be the funniest joke I’ll be hearing today. Anyway,a different bus…
Well, that settles it. Another 4 rupee note gone…
8:15 AM: Third Floor LT
The professor smiles. Another delinquent. Do these pitiful souls thinkthat they can actually come late to this class?
“Why are you late? Stuck in a Traffic Jam?”
(Boy, he’s smart, probably knows all the excuses)
“No Sir, I was stuck in the NBH lift” (Big grin)
(Stares at me, cursing under his breath, I’m sure) “Very well… takeyour seat.”
I join my comrades, not awakened by this clever debate.
Me: “What’s up?”
Sure, everybody’s a comedian.
8:40 AM: Where am I?
Me: “How can one sleep in this heat? Hey, are you sleeping?”
My thoughts drift towards what I might have for lunch today. It’ll probablythe same old…
“Human excreta, dead and decaying organic matter”
Yuck. I forgot that this was a lecture on (something to do with cleanliness).As I look for a place to throw up, The professor sees a much-awaited opportunity
“You there! Get up!”
5 guys stand up, hoping to get thrown out.
“No, that boy in the pink shirt. Do you know where we are?”
All eyes are on me. (That’s the second time today. I must be lookinggood) A sea of innocent faces, squinting at me, trying to stop the sweattrickling down their forehead into their eyes. I see desperation, confusionand even awe in their faces. It was as if they were suddenly whisked awayfrom a magical, mystery land of books and transparencies into the harshrealities of medical school.
Maybe I should respond with “Third floor LT, Sir!” That would give themquite a shock. Some of those faces might even show a rare smile.
“Sir, We were discussing the various aspects of proper management ofhealth and its administration to prevent spread of common diseases amongstthe society, especially the lower income classes, in the context of dietand living conditions of an individual”
That should cover just about everything…
“Get out of my class”
Not much argument there. I walk out, telling somebody to proxy for me.Boy, it’s heaven outside.
8:50 AM: NBH: Boys’ common room(s)
Seems like everybody went to watch the late show of some movie and havesome great reviews in store. We spend the next 20 minutes discussing whyGovinda is a better actor than Robert De Niro.
Meanwhile, the other guys arrive.
Wide-eyed-friend: “Yaar, mere group mein 15 bandey ward ja rahenhain!”
(Count on him to spoil the fun)
Me: “Chal yaar, kal padh lenge. Abhi basketball khelte hain”
Thus ending, 4 guys retreat. So much for great ideas.
12:10 PM: First floor LT (A lecture is in progress)
Me, I can’t remember how I passed the last few hours. I think I’m gettingold. You know, senile dementia.
Me: “What happens in senile dementia?”
The sleeping beauties arrive.
“Why are you late?”
They join us, all smiles.
Me: “Late ho gaye kya?”
Me and my big mouth.
12:55 PM: Outside the ICH
Broke-friend: “Yaar, Buy me a Pepsi.”
(Boy, was that witty or what)
Still Me: “Do we have to attend the prac?”
After a hearty meal at ICH, we stick 10 rupee notes into one guy’s handsand leave him to foot the bill.
2:15 PM: Some Lab
Working at blinding speed, I finish whatever was supposed to be doneand join my pals hanging around the new cute ‘lil demo.
Wolf-friend: “Ma’am, Please check my file.”
(This HAS to be a first)
Her: “Leave it on my desk, I’ll check it later”
(Perhaps he should add “Over dinner tonight?”)
3:30 PM: I MUST LEAVE NOW!
And by the way, anybody know my roll number?
4:10 PM: Bus stop
Sure, and at the rate I’m going, It’ll take me another 10 years.
And of course, I’ve missed the bus… No! I can’t believe my eyes! Thebus is late! Happiness! Rejoice! Oh, thank you god, for these small mercies!
At least I’ll enjoy a nice peaceful ride home…
“Nikhil! Hi! What are you doing here? I haven’t seen you in like 2 WEEKS!Nice shirt! Boy, I have so much to tell you! You know, that day I wentshopping and yak, yak, yakitty, yak…”
My thoughts drift through camels, straws, murder and settle at forensicmedicine. Test tomorrow
Copyright (c) 2004, Nikhil Goyal. All rights reserved.